Managing finances is a sensitive topic for many couples. However, the ‘money question’ undeniably is a vital one, and eventually pops up at some point of every relationship. And sometimes, it plays the crucial role in deciding whether or not to stay with our partner.
Our reader sent us her story, asking for your advice.
I am a girl of 22 years dating a guy of 27. We have been dating for almost a year, and I love this guy. But the problem is, he is really stingy. Maybe because he’s an Igbo.
Because of this, I have started to develop hatred for him. He doesn’t want to leave me. I say hurtful things on purpose to make him angry with me and let me go. However, the more I try, the more he convinces him to stay.
It’s not like I’m interested in his money. He stays in Kurudu [Abuja], to reach his place costs about N250 in transportation payment. After I pay the required N250 to visit him, he will use a N200 note to slap me in my face. But this money cannot take me to my place, so I have to add N50, or sometimes I would trek to reach my house. When he did it for the first time, I thought he just wanted to know what kind of girl I was. But now I see that it is not true, and it is rather a habit or a character trait that he inherited from his forefathers.
I try to make him understand, but all I say falls on deaf ears. He is stingy even to himself, he won’t buy clothes, all he ever buys is drinks.
He told me one day that he would like to marry me, and that I should wait for him. How can I wait for such a man? Only if I want to die young from hunger. If I mistakenly marry him, would he not become the woman of the house?
The funniest part of it all is that he tells me to dress up nicely when I visit him, but wouldn’t give me any money to buy clothes!